In the latest installment of things we never needed to know, Billy Bob Thornton doesn't shy away from crime scene sex.

You can all rest easy now, ladies.

The revelation was sort of bizarre. The conversation -- with TMZ cameras, of course -- started out innocently enough, with the 'Bad Santa' actor talking about his first tattoo that he got back in 1974.

He went on to talk about his distaste for male tramp stamps and was pleasant and charming. And then TMZ's cameraman got ridiculous.

"It'll be Valentine's Day, you're happy, you're with your lady, you're excited -- but she's on her thing," the camera man offers. (What "thing?" Are we 12?) "Are you still going in?"

Ever the class act, Thornton said, "Normally I wouldn't divulge that kind of information ... I've never been shy. Also, I'm a Cardinals fan."

While we have no clue what would prompt that sort of a question other than pure douchebaggery and trolling, at least we have some explanation for Thornton's facial hair now.