Cassandra Rose is a freelance writer and an avid bibliophile with a B.A. from Rutgers University in English and Medieval Studies. On the rare occasion that real life isn't getting in the way, she spends her free time being snarky under the Twitter handle yrchmonger and contributing to the literary blog Bibliomantics. She currently lives in New Jersey where she was raised on a steady diet of Mel Brooks, British comedies and pop culture.
Cassandra Rose
StarDust: Jay-Z Tells A Little Old Lady He’s Not Famous Enough + More
- Jay-Z meets a lady on the subway who has no idea who he is and it's utterly adorable.
Chris Brown Shows How Many Joints Will Fit in His Stupid Piehole at Once [PHOTOS]
Now that he and Rihanna have generously righted all that's wrong with music, Chris Brown is on tour in Amsterdam. And while he's there, he's taking the opportunity to smoke as much weed as humanly possible. Because when in Amsterdam, you do as the Amsterdamians do.
Amsterdamites? Amsterdammers? Whatever. We just call them "the lucky few."
StarDust: We’re So Old We Remember When Eddie Murphy Was Funny + More
- Eddie Murphy is the most overpaid actor in Hollywood. Quelle surprise.
Ashton Kutcher Is Steve Jobs and It’s Actually Kinda Terrifying
Yes, Ashton Kutcher will still be starring as Steve Jobs in the biopic tentatively titled 'jOBS,' and yes, we still think they should consider changing the name.
Maybe 'iJobs.' Or 'Steve iJobs.' Or 'Steve Jobs Now Lives in the iClouds.' Something.
Heidi Klum Channels a Bedazzled Cleopatra for Hurricane Sandy Benefit [PHOTOS]
'Twas a month after Halloween and all through New York, Heidi Klum was hosting a gala to benefit Hurricane Sandy victims. With Santa of course.
FINE WE AREN'T POETS.
Adam Levine Thinks Honey Boo Boo May Have Been Who the Mayans Were Talking About
Despite being a coach on 'The Voice,' which makes amateur singers perform in a boxing ring while Cee Lo Green shows off his exotic animal collection, Adam Levine has gone on record saying it's actually Honey Boo Boo who carries the weight of society's downfall on her tiny little shoulders.
Damn. First she's blamed for car wrecks when she wasn't even there, and now this happens. Sister can't catch
IRS to Lindsay Lohan: All Your Bank Accounts Are Belong to Us
As if being arrested (yet again) for punching psychics in the face wasn't enough tabloid fodder for Lindsay Lohan, the IRS has now seized all her bank accounts for an unpaid tax bill.
Thus giving "poor LiLo" a whole new meaning.
Hugh Hefner + Crystal Harris Are Engaged Again
Remember that time Playboy magnate Hugh Hefner was dating that young, attractive blonde?
No, not that one. Not that one either. Or that one. Or those two.
Dumb Celebrity Quotes – Who Said This?
Celebrities are privileged drug addicts. This television personality once said, "When I pictured heroin, I pictured some crazy crackhead with no shoes under a bridge ... I was never under a bridge, and I always has shoes."
Yes, Chris Brown + Rihanna Are Back Together [PHOTO]
Despite spending Halloween and Thanksgiving side-by-side, Chris Brown and Rihanna have continued to pretend everyone is too stupid to realize they're back together.
So maybe this picture of her straddling him is their official coming-out. On the plus side, at least she's wearing all her clothes this time.
John Travolta Is Using His Scientology Powers to Heal People Now
Thanks to the mystical alien powers of Scientology, John Travolta can now heal the sick, raise the dead and fly. Or at least “cure” injured people of debilitating pain thanks to a special super secret technique called “an assist.”
Yeah, we know. Just smile and nod. It's safest that way.
Britney Spears + Kevin Federline Romantically Reunite – Over Their Tax Returns
Former married couple who disgusted the nation Britney Spears and Kevin Federline are being brought back together over the most practical of circumstances: an unpaid tax bill from the state of California.
Cue a montage of their children re-enacting 'The Parent Trap.'