Carla Cheddar — Hot Mess of the Day

Location: Super Walmart's dairy aisle, every Thursday between 7 and 8:30pm, or by appointment.

Occupation: World's most enthusiastic sample girl.

Top 5 Cheeses: Port wine, American, White American, Velveeta, EZ-Cheez

Secret: Hasn't pooped in years.

Her Motto: “The shredder, the better."